结婚那天，妈问我：坐在角落里象两个要饭模样的人是谁? 。。。看完后我哭了
by 低调南 on Tuesday, April 6, 2010 at 11:30am
请耐心看下去。。。
结婚那天，妈问我：坐在角落里象两个要饭模样的人是谁？
我看过去的时候，有个老头正盯着我，旁边还有个老太太，发现我看着他们时赶忙低下头。我不认识他们但也不象要饭的，衣服是新的连折印都看得出来。妈说象要饭的是他们佝偻着身子，老太的身边倚了根拐杖的缘故。
妈说天池是孤儿，那边没亲戚来，如果不认识就轰他们走吧。现在要饭的坏着呢，喜欢等在酒店门口，见哪家办喜事就装作亲戚来吃黑酒。
我说不会，叫来天池问一下吧？天池慌里慌张把我的手捧花都掉地上了，最后吱吱唔唔地说是他们家堂叔和堂婶。我瞪了妈妈一眼：差点把亲戚赶走。
妈说天池你不是孤儿吗？哪来的亲戚呢？
天池怕妈，低头说是他家远房的亲戚，好长时间不来往了。但结婚是大事，家里一个亲戚没来心里觉着是个憾事，所以……
我靠着天池的肩埋怨他有亲戚来也不早说，应该把他们调一桌，既然是亲戚就不能坐在备用桌上。天池拦着说就让他们坐那吧，坐别桌他们吃着也不自在。
直到开席那桌上也就坐了堂叔和堂婶。敬谢席酒经过那桌，天池犹豫了一下拉着我从他们身边擦了过去。回头看到他们的头埋的很低，想了想我把天池给拽了回去：堂叔、堂婶，我们给你俩敬酒了！
两人抬起头有点不相信的盯着我。二老的头发都是花白的，看上去很老应该有七八十岁的样子，堂婶的眼睛很空洞，脸虽对着我但眼神闪忽不定。我拿手不确定的在她眼前晃了晃，没反应。原来堂婶是个瞎子。
堂、堂叔、堂婶，这是俺媳妇小洁，俺们现在给你们敬酒呢！天池在用乡音提醒他们。
哦、哦。堂叔歪歪斜斜地站了起来，左手扶着堂婶的肩右手颤微微地端起酒杯，手指背上都是黄黄的茧，厚厚的指夹逢里留着黑黑的泥。面朝黄土背朝天的日子让他们过早地累弯了腰。我惊讶地发现，堂叔的右腿是空的。
堂婶是瞎子，堂叔是瘸子，怎样的一对夫妻啊？
别站了，你们坐下吧。我走过去扶住他们。堂叔又摇晃着坐下了，无缘由的堂婶眼里忽然就叭嗒叭嗒直掉泪，看到堂叔无言地拍着她的背。本想劝他们两句，但天池拉着我离开了。
我跟天池说，等他们回家的时候给他们一点钱吧，太可怜了。两人都是残疾，这日子根本想不通怎么过。
天池点点头没说话，紧紧拥着我。
第一年的除夕，天池说胃疼没吃下晚饭回房睡觉去了。我让妈妈熬点大米粥也跟着进了房。天池躺在床上，眼里还憋着泪。
我说天池不带这样的，第一年的除夕就不跟我们一块吃晚饭，还跑房里这样。好象我们家亏待你似的，一过节你就胃疼，哪有这样的事情？其实我知道你不是胃疼，说吧什么事？
天池闷了半天说对不起，他只是想起堂叔和堂婶还有他死去的爹娘。他怕在桌上忍不住，惹爸妈不高兴才推说胃疼。
我搂着他说：真是个傻孩子，想他们我们过完年看他们去就成了，再说我也想知道他俩是怎么过日子的。
天池说算了，那条山路特别难走。你会累着的，等以后路通了我们生了小孩再带你去那看他们吧。
我心里想说：等我们生小孩的时候他们还不一定在呢！但没敢讲出来，嘴上说给他们再寄些钱物吧！
第二年的中秋期间我正巧在外出差，中秋节那天又回不了家。我特别想天池和爸妈，我就跟天池煲电话粥。
我问天池想我想得睡不着怎么办？天池说就上网或者看电视，再不行就睡那睁着眼睛狠狠得想。
那晚，我们直到把手机聊得发烫没电为止。
躺在宾馆的床上，看着窗外圆圆的月亮，我怎么也睡不着。睁着眼睛流着泪想天池、想爸爸、想妈妈。想到天池估计也没睡着，说不定正在网上神游。翻身我也打开电脑，重新申请了一QQ号名叫读你，想捉弄一下天池。查了一下，天池果然在，我主动加了他，他接受了。
我问他：这样一个万家团圆的好日子，你为什么还在网上闲逛呢？
他说：因为我老婆在外出差，想她睡不着觉所以就上网看看。
我挺满意这句话，接着又打出：老婆不在家，可以找个情人代替，比如说网上，聊以自慰一下。
半天他才敲出一行：如果你想找情人的话，对不起，我不是你找的人，再见。
对不起，我不是那个意思，你别生气。叭叭叭，我赶紧发过去。
过了一会他问我：你怎么也在网上闲逛呢？
我说：我在外打工，现在想爸爸和妈妈。刚刚和男朋友通完电话还是睡不着，就上网了。
我也想我爹和娘，只是，亲在外，子欲养而不能。
亲在外，子欲养而不能。怎么讲？我把这句话又重复敲了过去。我有点莫明其妙，天池怎么说这样的话？
你叫读你，我今天就让你读一次吧。有些事情放在心里很久会得病，拿出来晒晒会舒服些，反正你我也不认识，你就当作听一个故事吧！
于是，我意外地知道了天池一直隐藏在内心的事情。
30年前，我爹快五十了还没娶亲，因为他腿瘸加上家里又穷没有姑娘愿意嫁他。后来，庄上来了个要饭的老头还搀着个瞎眼的女人。老头病得很重，爹看他们可怜就让他们在自家歇息。没想到一住下那老头就没起来过，后来老头的女儿就是那瞎眼的女人嫁给了我爹。
第二年生下了我。
我家的日子过得很清苦，可我从来没饿过一顿。爹和娘种不了田，没有收入就帮别人家剥玉米粒，一天剥下来十指全是血泡，第二天缠上布条再剥。为了我上学，家里养了三只鸡，两只鸡生蛋卖钱，留下一只生蛋我吃。娘说她在城里要饭时听说城里的娃上学都吃鸡蛋，咱家娃也吃，将来比城里的娃更聪明。但他们从来都不吃，有回我看见娘把蛋打进锅里后用嘴舔着蛋壳里剩下的蛋清，我搂着娘嚎啕大哭。说什么也不肯吃鸡蛋了，爹知道原委后气得要用棍子打娘。最后我妥协，前提就是我们三人一块吃。虽然他们同意了，但每次也就象征性的用牙齿碰一下。
庄上的人从来不叫我名字，都叫我是瘸瞎子家的。爹娘一听到有人这样叫我必定会跟那人拼命。娘看不见就会拿了砖块乱砸，嘴上还骂着：你们这些杀千刀的，我们瘸瞎，我娃好好的，就不许你们这样叫唤。将来你们一个都不如我娃。
那年中考，瘸瞎子家的考了全县第一的喜讯 让爹娘着实风光了一把。镇上替我们家出了所有的学杂费，送我上学的那天爹第一次出了山。上车的那会，我眼泪扑剌剌的直掉，爹一手拄着拐一手替我擦泪：进了城要好好学，以后就在城里找工作娶媳妇。别人问起你爹娘你就说你是孤儿，没爹娘，不然别人会看不起你。特别是娶不上媳妇，人家会嫌弃你。误了你娶媳妇，我都无脸去见老祖。
爹！我让爹别在说了，这是什么话，还没有用呢咋就不认爹娘呢？娘也说这是真话，要听。你不记得在学校里吗？只要说你是瘸瞎子家的，别人就会拿白眼挤兑你。刚开始连老师都不喜欢你。以后，你带了城里媳妇回家就说俺们是你的堂叔和堂婶。娘说完就在那抹泪。爹说，不要把媳妇带回家，一带回来你娘忍不住就会露馅的。然后往我怀里揣了十个熟鸡蛋就拖着娘走了。
我的眼泪也扑剌剌地往下掉，残疾不是他们的错，那是老天对他们的不公。但他们却生了一个完美的天池给我。这个傻天池，这样的爹娘，无法再完美了。我很生气，他怎么就这么小看我呢？
那后来，你就告诉你媳妇他们是你堂叔和堂婶？我敲过去这句话。
本来我不信。媳妇找的是我又不是爹娘，为啥爹娘都不能认呢？不过我在外十年，爹娘一次都没去过我的学校。第一年工作，我想带他们进城玩玩，他们都不肯，说让人晓得我爹娘是残疾人会在我脸上抹黑，影响我娶媳妇。一辈子都在山里了不想出去了。娘还说她就是从城里来的，也没啥意思。
后来，我谈了第一个女朋友，当我认为时机差不多的时候，就带她回了趟家。谁知到家后，她晚饭都没留下吃一顿就走了，我追出去她说，和这样的人过日子她一天都过不下去。
还说我们家基因有问题，以后的小孩肯定也不会健康。我气得让她有多远滚多远。回到家，娘在那哭，爹也骂我。说我不听他们的话，非要断了咱家的香火不可。
后来，我遇上了第二个女朋友，就是现在我的老婆。我很爱她，做梦都怕失去她，她们家又很有钱，亲戚都是些上等人家，有了前车之鉴我很害怕只能不孝了。但是一到逢年过节我就想他们，心里堵得慌，难受。
那你从来就没有告诉过你老婆？也许她不计较这些呢？
我没说过，也不敢说。如果她同意了我想我岳母也不会同意的。我和她们住在一起，岳父在外是有脸面的人。如果爹娘来了不是在他们脸上抹黑吗？我也只能在出差学习的时候偷偷回去看上两眼。谢谢你听我说了这么多，现在我的心里舒服多了。
下了网，我依旧没有觉意。都说儿不嫌母丑，狗不嫌家贫，看看我们都做了什么？我理解天池的无奈，也了解他爹娘的苦衷。但他们不知道却将无辜的我陷入了无情无义的逆境之中。
天将放亮时，我敲开了部门经理的门，告诉他下面的事情请他全权处理，我有点非常重要的事情尽快要办，一切就拜托他了。然后简单收拾一下行李我就直奔火车站。还好，赶得上头班列车。
那条山路确实很难走。刚开始腿上还有点劲，后来脚上磨起了泡我就再也走不动了。正是中午时分，太阳又晒得厉害，我只有喘气的份。背来的水差不多快喝完了，我也不知道下面还有多少路程要走。脱下鞋子挤了水泡，那一会疼得我都哭出声来，真想打个电话让天池来接我回家，最后还是忍住了。从路边揪一把芦苇花垫在脚底，感觉脚上舒服多了。想到天池的爹娘此时还在家劳作着腿上忽的一下就来了劲，站起来继续往前走。
当老村长把我领到天池家门口的时候，那一片烧得红红的晚霞正照在他们家门口的老枣树上。枣树下坐着堂叔，哦不、是天池的爹，爹比结婚时看到的老多了，手上剥着玉米，拐杖安静地倚在他那条残缺的腿上。娘跪在地上准备收晒好的玉米，手正一把一把地往里撸。
这，宛如一幅画，而画中便是这世上最完美的爹娘。
我一步一步地往他们跟前走着，爹看到了我，手中的玉米掉在了地上，嘴巴张得老大，吃惊地问：你、你咋过来了？
娘在一旁摸索着问：他爹，谁来啦？
天、天池家的。
啊！在、在哪？娘惊慌失措地找着我的方向。
我弯腰放下行李，然后一把抓着她的手，对着他们，带着深深地痛、重重地跪了下去：爹！娘！我来接你们回家了！
爹干咳了两下，泪无声地从爬满皱纹的脸上流出。
俺就说，俺的娃没白养阿！娘把双手在自个身上来回的搓，然后一把抱住我，一行行的泪水从她空洞的眼里热热地流进我的脖子里。
我带爹娘走的时候村里是放了鞭炮的。我又为爹娘风光了一次。
当天池打开门，看到一左一右站在我身边的爹和娘时吃惊不小，怔怔地愣在那，一语未发。
我说：天池，我是读你的人。我把咱爹娘接回来了。这么完美的爹娘，你怎么舍得把他们丢在山里？
天池泣不成声，紧紧的抱住我，像他娘一样把一行泪流进我的脖子里。
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Random
“做人没有毅力， 欠要求，到头来只会一事无成，儿子”
~香港连续剧“公主嫁到”二娘对她儿子说的话~
"God wants our emotions to follow our lead, not lead our lives."
"遵守律法，才能得着平安。"
"I don't wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has got to get down to earth. Do what you should do, when you should do it, whether you feel like it or not."
"Every move we make and every action we take, matters not just for us, but for all of us...and for all time."
"act your way into a feeling than to feel your way into an action. “Fake it ‘til you make it” "
"人生不可能總是順心如意, 但持續朝著陽光走，影子就會躲在後面, 刺眼，卻是對的方向。"
~Mr.Giddens. -- 九把刀~
~香港连续剧“公主嫁到”二娘对她儿子说的话~
"God wants our emotions to follow our lead, not lead our lives."
"遵守律法，才能得着平安。"
"I don't wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has got to get down to earth. Do what you should do, when you should do it, whether you feel like it or not."
"Every move we make and every action we take, matters not just for us, but for all of us...and for all time."
"act your way into a feeling than to feel your way into an action. “Fake it ‘til you make it” "
"人生不可能總是順心如意, 但持續朝著陽光走，影子就會躲在後面, 刺眼，卻是對的方向。"
~Mr.Giddens. -- 九把刀~
“做人就是要努力付出过才会不枉此生。如果一味的懒惰，什么都不作，不愿为自己的梦想牺牲，付出。到头来，只会对人生对自己更加的失望， 并对任何事失去兴趣，变得更加懒惰更加的空虚。假以时日，回头看时就会懊悔一生。
如果没有明确的梦想，那先不论自己的梦想是什么。就算是不喜欢做的事情，只要对所有事情都全力以赴用心的去付出，全力以赴用心的去做的更好，去拼命，燃烧生命。就算没有什么成就，只要用心，努力，的去生活，那么就会发现自己没有慌渡生命，就会发现每件事其实都很有趣，人生也会更有活力更精彩。
只要用心，用尽全力，全力以赴去做好每一件事情，用心，用尽全力，全力以赴去做好人生中自己扮演的每一个角色（自己，人子，兄弟，朋友，爱人，学生，BB军官，神的儿女，Elmo的爸爸），就可以不枉此生！”
~看过动漫“会长是女仆大人”后所悟。此动漫里，大家，特别是会长，都很努力，用心，全力以赴去生活，去做好自己。~
如果没有明确的梦想，那先不论自己的梦想是什么。就算是不喜欢做的事情，只要对所有事情都全力以赴用心的去付出，全力以赴用心的去做的更好，去拼命，燃烧生命。就算没有什么成就，只要用心，努力，的去生活，那么就会发现自己没有慌渡生命，就会发现每件事其实都很有趣，人生也会更有活力更精彩。
只要用心，用尽全力，全力以赴去做好每一件事情，用心，用尽全力，全力以赴去做好人生中自己扮演的每一个角色（自己，人子，兄弟，朋友，爱人，学生，BB军官，神的儿女，Elmo的爸爸），就可以不枉此生！”
~看过动漫“会长是女仆大人”后所悟。此动漫里，大家，特别是会长，都很努力，用心，全力以赴去生活，去做好自己。~
Raising Kids Who Pray
Raising Kids Who Pray
By Cheryl Sacks 5/27/2009 6:19:33 PM
My friend’s nine-year-old son came home crestfallen from Sunday school one day. “What’s wrong?” his mother asked.
“They wouldn’t pray for my prayer request,” said the boy. “I wanted to pray about the panda bears in China, but they said we should pray for personal things. Why couldn’t we pray about the pandas, Mom?”
I’m sure the Sunday school teacher at my friend’s church wasn’t trying to be insensitive about the dwindling population of pandas in China; but unfortunately, he or she missed an opportunity to affirm the boy’s faith and expectation, two powerful motivating factors when it comes to equipping and empowering children in prayer. Children are motivated to pray about the things that touch their hearts—friends, family, teachers, even pets. We often smile at the innocence of their prayers, some of them quite nonreligious. But that’s the way we want them to pray—naturally.
As they learn to approach their heavenly Father with their daily concerns and needs—and see Him answer—children learn to trust Him as the one who can fight their battles and those of the people they love. They learn to look to Him to provide for them, defend them, and to intervene in the world in real and powerful ways. If we are not quick to listen to even what may seem like “out of the box” prayer concerns, we may miss hearing that child’s heart.
Children, after all, are closer than adults to the approach Jesus tells us to take in prayer: with personal expectation and from the standpoint of a father-child relationship. “Ask and it shall be given to you,” He says in Matthew 7. “Seek, and you shall find . . . if you then know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!” This is how children still look at the world.
For all their innocence, children’s prayers, though not as articulate as adults’, are worth listening to. Children, it turns out, share many of our same concerns. Hillary, a small friend of mine, was five or six when she became deeply concerned for a friend in her neighborhood. The little girl was suffering constant respiratory distress as a result of her parents’ smoking in the home. Powerless to help her friend by any physical means, Hillary began to pray that God would move the parents to quit smoking and provide relief for her friend. Sure enough, within a couple of months, without anyone saying a word to them, both parents quit smoking!
And it’s not only personal problems. Children as young as three and four years old can also be sensitive to poverty, hunger, crime, and divorce. I once attended a church service where children and youth were invited to join adults on the platform to help lead in prayer. “Would you pray for the hurting and abused children in the world?” the speaker asked, handing the microphone to a five-year-old boy. With stammering lips and a shaking voice the child began to pray. As he continued to pray for his generation I was amazed at his clarity and focus. “God make the mothers and fathers stop fighting,” he cried. “Tell them it’s hurting their kids.” Another child prayed for the salvation of young people who did not know Christ. Others prayed for revival in their schools and that our nation would return to God. The simplicity of their prayers, accompanied by humility and brokenness, brought tremendous conviction to the hearts of everyone in the room.
The immediacy of children’s prayers can continue through high school. When our daughter Nicole was a junior in high school she started a citywide prayer ministry called Sacred Edge. The first Friday night of every month young people from around the Phoenix area gathered to call out to God for the things affecting their generation—fatherlessness, drugs, loneliness.
These were some gutsy prayers, maybe even what some of us would consider a little “raw.” Yet I would rather see a young person pray prayers from the heart than the most eloquent rote prayer. Jesus spoke to this difference: “When you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition” (Matthew 6:7).
Photo: Jupiterimages/Getty Images
Kids don’t have to wing it all the time: memorized prayers have their place in launching our children’s prayer lives too. The Lord’s Prayer is a biblical framework to help children consider topics of prayer they might not otherwise think about. When Nicole was little, we would pray the Lord’s Prayer together line by line, stopping at each point to pray extemporaneously. What are our temptations? In what ways do we, personally, need deliverance from evil? How do we need to forgive and be forgiven?
The Psalms are another resource for Scriptural prayer for kids. Psalm 91, which talks about God being our refuge and fortress, makes a great prayer for protection. Children can visualize the description of God’s wings covering us in their white feathers, as the Psalmist tells us that we need not fear (vs. 4, 5). This is powerful imagery that can bring great comfort to a child in times of distress. “Lord, cover me with Your powerful wings of protection. I know You will take care of me. Help me not to be afraid.”
Children need to know the name of the Lord is a strong tower; they can run into it and are safe (Prov. 18:10). By praying these Scriptures, they can turn a feeling of powerlessness (very common for children) into confidence that though they may be small, they can pray powerful, strong prayers in Jesus’ name and He will help them.
Scriptural prayers are a great help, too, for adults who are uncertain about their own ability to pray. Here are some additional practical ideas to help you get started, no matter how old (or how young) your children are:
1. Invite your own children into your prayer time. When they see you pouring out your heart in a natural way to God, it will encourage them to do the same. What would a child watching your prayer life learn? If children see us praying in dull, repetitious ways, they’ll get a picture of prayer opposite to what we want them to see. But if we pray from the heart, kids will see the freshness and power of our relationship with God.
2. Create a time for family prayer. It may be extended prayer at meals, at bedtime, or a special weekly gathering. In this way, children learn to pray by listening, watching, and participating. This special prayer time will not only help connect the hearts each family member with the Lord but also with one another.
3. Allow children to be a part of corporate prayer times in your place of worship. Children need to see people of all ages in communication with God—and to hear about the answers to those prayers. Churches need to communicate to children that their prayers and concerns are just as powerful and valued as those of adults.
4. Give kids visuals to help motivate their prayers for issues outside of their own lives and relationships. Children do not think abstractly as adults do. Pictures (such as those from magazines or of children in need around the world) can show them real needs and evoke the kind of emotional response that is necessary to pray prayers from the heart.
5. Help children get to know their heavenly Father. This is perhaps the most crucial point of all. That is because it is more important for them to get to know the Person to whom they are praying than it is for them to pray perfect prayers. They need to realize that prayer is a relationship, not a religious activity, nor is it a “magic” formula. It is important children understand they are praying to their loving heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ—they aren’t just wishing upon a star or thinking nice thoughts.
6. As soon as your child is ready, lead him or her in a prayer to receive Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior. It’s after all the most important heartfelt prayer he or she will ever pray!
Cheryl Sacks is a conference speaker, local church prayer consultant, and author of The Prayer Saturated Church—A Comprehensive Handbook for Prayer Leaders and co-author of Prayer Saturated Kids—Equipping and Empowering Children in Prayer (NavPress). Cheryl and her husband Hal are co-founders of BridgeBuilders Int’l Leadership Network, a Christian ministry in Phoenix, Ariz.
~Adapted from: http://www.purposedriven.com/article.html?c=140077&l=1~
By Cheryl Sacks 5/27/2009 6:19:33 PM
My friend’s nine-year-old son came home crestfallen from Sunday school one day. “What’s wrong?” his mother asked.
“They wouldn’t pray for my prayer request,” said the boy. “I wanted to pray about the panda bears in China, but they said we should pray for personal things. Why couldn’t we pray about the pandas, Mom?”
I’m sure the Sunday school teacher at my friend’s church wasn’t trying to be insensitive about the dwindling population of pandas in China; but unfortunately, he or she missed an opportunity to affirm the boy’s faith and expectation, two powerful motivating factors when it comes to equipping and empowering children in prayer. Children are motivated to pray about the things that touch their hearts—friends, family, teachers, even pets. We often smile at the innocence of their prayers, some of them quite nonreligious. But that’s the way we want them to pray—naturally.
As they learn to approach their heavenly Father with their daily concerns and needs—and see Him answer—children learn to trust Him as the one who can fight their battles and those of the people they love. They learn to look to Him to provide for them, defend them, and to intervene in the world in real and powerful ways. If we are not quick to listen to even what may seem like “out of the box” prayer concerns, we may miss hearing that child’s heart.
Children, after all, are closer than adults to the approach Jesus tells us to take in prayer: with personal expectation and from the standpoint of a father-child relationship. “Ask and it shall be given to you,” He says in Matthew 7. “Seek, and you shall find . . . if you then know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!” This is how children still look at the world.
For all their innocence, children’s prayers, though not as articulate as adults’, are worth listening to. Children, it turns out, share many of our same concerns. Hillary, a small friend of mine, was five or six when she became deeply concerned for a friend in her neighborhood. The little girl was suffering constant respiratory distress as a result of her parents’ smoking in the home. Powerless to help her friend by any physical means, Hillary began to pray that God would move the parents to quit smoking and provide relief for her friend. Sure enough, within a couple of months, without anyone saying a word to them, both parents quit smoking!
And it’s not only personal problems. Children as young as three and four years old can also be sensitive to poverty, hunger, crime, and divorce. I once attended a church service where children and youth were invited to join adults on the platform to help lead in prayer. “Would you pray for the hurting and abused children in the world?” the speaker asked, handing the microphone to a five-year-old boy. With stammering lips and a shaking voice the child began to pray. As he continued to pray for his generation I was amazed at his clarity and focus. “God make the mothers and fathers stop fighting,” he cried. “Tell them it’s hurting their kids.” Another child prayed for the salvation of young people who did not know Christ. Others prayed for revival in their schools and that our nation would return to God. The simplicity of their prayers, accompanied by humility and brokenness, brought tremendous conviction to the hearts of everyone in the room.
The immediacy of children’s prayers can continue through high school. When our daughter Nicole was a junior in high school she started a citywide prayer ministry called Sacred Edge. The first Friday night of every month young people from around the Phoenix area gathered to call out to God for the things affecting their generation—fatherlessness, drugs, loneliness.
These were some gutsy prayers, maybe even what some of us would consider a little “raw.” Yet I would rather see a young person pray prayers from the heart than the most eloquent rote prayer. Jesus spoke to this difference: “When you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition” (Matthew 6:7).
Photo: Jupiterimages/Getty Images
Kids don’t have to wing it all the time: memorized prayers have their place in launching our children’s prayer lives too. The Lord’s Prayer is a biblical framework to help children consider topics of prayer they might not otherwise think about. When Nicole was little, we would pray the Lord’s Prayer together line by line, stopping at each point to pray extemporaneously. What are our temptations? In what ways do we, personally, need deliverance from evil? How do we need to forgive and be forgiven?
The Psalms are another resource for Scriptural prayer for kids. Psalm 91, which talks about God being our refuge and fortress, makes a great prayer for protection. Children can visualize the description of God’s wings covering us in their white feathers, as the Psalmist tells us that we need not fear (vs. 4, 5). This is powerful imagery that can bring great comfort to a child in times of distress. “Lord, cover me with Your powerful wings of protection. I know You will take care of me. Help me not to be afraid.”
Children need to know the name of the Lord is a strong tower; they can run into it and are safe (Prov. 18:10). By praying these Scriptures, they can turn a feeling of powerlessness (very common for children) into confidence that though they may be small, they can pray powerful, strong prayers in Jesus’ name and He will help them.
Scriptural prayers are a great help, too, for adults who are uncertain about their own ability to pray. Here are some additional practical ideas to help you get started, no matter how old (or how young) your children are:
1. Invite your own children into your prayer time. When they see you pouring out your heart in a natural way to God, it will encourage them to do the same. What would a child watching your prayer life learn? If children see us praying in dull, repetitious ways, they’ll get a picture of prayer opposite to what we want them to see. But if we pray from the heart, kids will see the freshness and power of our relationship with God.
2. Create a time for family prayer. It may be extended prayer at meals, at bedtime, or a special weekly gathering. In this way, children learn to pray by listening, watching, and participating. This special prayer time will not only help connect the hearts each family member with the Lord but also with one another.
3. Allow children to be a part of corporate prayer times in your place of worship. Children need to see people of all ages in communication with God—and to hear about the answers to those prayers. Churches need to communicate to children that their prayers and concerns are just as powerful and valued as those of adults.
4. Give kids visuals to help motivate their prayers for issues outside of their own lives and relationships. Children do not think abstractly as adults do. Pictures (such as those from magazines or of children in need around the world) can show them real needs and evoke the kind of emotional response that is necessary to pray prayers from the heart.
5. Help children get to know their heavenly Father. This is perhaps the most crucial point of all. That is because it is more important for them to get to know the Person to whom they are praying than it is for them to pray perfect prayers. They need to realize that prayer is a relationship, not a religious activity, nor is it a “magic” formula. It is important children understand they are praying to their loving heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ—they aren’t just wishing upon a star or thinking nice thoughts.
6. As soon as your child is ready, lead him or her in a prayer to receive Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior. It’s after all the most important heartfelt prayer he or she will ever pray!
Cheryl Sacks is a conference speaker, local church prayer consultant, and author of The Prayer Saturated Church—A Comprehensive Handbook for Prayer Leaders and co-author of Prayer Saturated Kids—Equipping and Empowering Children in Prayer (NavPress). Cheryl and her husband Hal are co-founders of BridgeBuilders Int’l Leadership Network, a Christian ministry in Phoenix, Ariz.
~Adapted from: http://www.purposedriven.com/article.html?c=140077&l=1~
‘爱’
‘爱’
刚看到一则小故事，和你们分享一下。
上课了。老教授面带微笑，走进教室，对同学们说：“我受一 家机构委托，来做一项问卷调查，请同学们帮个忙。”一听这 话，教室里轻微的一阵议论：问卷？比上课有趣多了。
问卷表发下来，同学们一看，只有两道题。
1、他很爱她。她细细的瓜子脸，弯弯的娥眉，面色白皙，美 丽动人。可是有一天，她不幸遇上了车祸，痊愈后，脸上留 下几道大大的丑陋疤痕。你觉得，他会一如既往地爱她吗？
A、他一定会 B、他一定不会 C、他可能会
2、她很爱他。他是商界的精英，儒雅沉稳，敢打敢拼。忽然有 一天，他破产了。你觉得，她还会像以前一样爱他吗？
A、她一定会 B、她一定不会 C、她可能会
一会儿，同学们就做好了。问卷收上来，教授一统计，发现： 第一题有10%的同学选A，10%的同学选B，80%的 同学选C。第二题呢，30%的同学选了A，30%的同学选 B，40%的同学选C。
“看来，美女毁容比男人破产，更让人不能容忍啊。”教授笑 了，“做这两题时，潜意识里，你们是不是把他和她当成了恋人 关系？”
“是啊。”同学们答得很整齐。
“可是，题目本身并没有说他和她是恋人关系啊？”教授似有 深意地看着大家，“现在，我们来假设一下，如果，第一题 中的‘他’是‘她’的父亲，第二题中的‘她’是‘他’的 母亲。让你把这两道题重新做一遍，你还会坚持原来的选择 吗？”
问卷再次发到同学们的手中，教室里忽然变得非常宁静，一张 张年青的面庞变得凝重而深沉。几分钟后，问卷收了上来，教授 再一统计，两道题，同学们都100%地选了A。
教授的语调深沉而动情：“这个世界上，有一种爱，亘古绵长， 无私无求；不因季节更替。不因名利浮沉，这就是父母的爱 啊！”
看了，想了，懂了，别忘了世上最爱我们的人就是家里的父母。 想家了给家里打个电话，过节了给父母发条短信，父母其 实很容易满足的，我们一个小小的举动就能给父母带来无限的感 动。
善待自己的父母，他们永远是最爱你们的。
[他们，是我们人生的起点。]
~转自铁血社/猫扑 mop.com~
刚看到一则小故事，和你们分享一下。
上课了。老教授面带微笑，走进教室，对同学们说：“我受一 家机构委托，来做一项问卷调查，请同学们帮个忙。”一听这 话，教室里轻微的一阵议论：问卷？比上课有趣多了。
问卷表发下来，同学们一看，只有两道题。
1、他很爱她。她细细的瓜子脸，弯弯的娥眉，面色白皙，美 丽动人。可是有一天，她不幸遇上了车祸，痊愈后，脸上留 下几道大大的丑陋疤痕。你觉得，他会一如既往地爱她吗？
A、他一定会 B、他一定不会 C、他可能会
2、她很爱他。他是商界的精英，儒雅沉稳，敢打敢拼。忽然有 一天，他破产了。你觉得，她还会像以前一样爱他吗？
A、她一定会 B、她一定不会 C、她可能会
一会儿，同学们就做好了。问卷收上来，教授一统计，发现： 第一题有10%的同学选A，10%的同学选B，80%的 同学选C。第二题呢，30%的同学选了A，30%的同学选 B，40%的同学选C。
“看来，美女毁容比男人破产，更让人不能容忍啊。”教授笑 了，“做这两题时，潜意识里，你们是不是把他和她当成了恋人 关系？”
“是啊。”同学们答得很整齐。
“可是，题目本身并没有说他和她是恋人关系啊？”教授似有 深意地看着大家，“现在，我们来假设一下，如果，第一题 中的‘他’是‘她’的父亲，第二题中的‘她’是‘他’的 母亲。让你把这两道题重新做一遍，你还会坚持原来的选择 吗？”
问卷再次发到同学们的手中，教室里忽然变得非常宁静，一张 张年青的面庞变得凝重而深沉。几分钟后，问卷收了上来，教授 再一统计，两道题，同学们都100%地选了A。
教授的语调深沉而动情：“这个世界上，有一种爱，亘古绵长， 无私无求；不因季节更替。不因名利浮沉，这就是父母的爱 啊！”
看了，想了，懂了，别忘了世上最爱我们的人就是家里的父母。 想家了给家里打个电话，过节了给父母发条短信，父母其 实很容易满足的，我们一个小小的举动就能给父母带来无限的感 动。
善待自己的父母，他们永远是最爱你们的。
[他们，是我们人生的起点。]
~转自铁血社/猫扑 mop.com~
Hooray for Godlywood
Hooray for Godlywood
By Christopher W. Davis 4/22/2009 11:57:37 AM
Not much happens in Albany, Georgia. Or so it seems. Yes, the town is the commercial center of southwestern Georgia, the birthplace of Ray Charles, the site of Martin Luther King Jr.’s 1961 “America’s shame” speech that led to his arrest, the pecan and quail-hunting capital of the world. But for the most part Albany has escaped the glare of national attention. So it was something of a surprise last fall when the associate pastor of one of the town’s 106 Baptist churches found himself on the phone with a newsman from The Hollywood Reporter.
The journalist was looking at the latest list of new movies, and here was this mini-budget, Christian film, Fireproof, coming out of nowhere—from the Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia, of all places—blowing everyone out of the water by opening at No. 4, beating out even Spike Lee’s hyper-hyped $45 million World War II epic, Miracle at St. Anna.
“Who in the world are you guys?” he asked, bewildered.
The associate pastor, Alex Kendrick, smiled. He loves it when the power of prayer stuns people.
In the past six years, Alex, 38, and his brother and fellow minister, Stephen, 35, have made three micro-budget movies that are redefining faith-based films—Flywheel (2003), a morality tale about a used-car salesman who saves his business by turning it over to God, Facing the Giants (2006), in which an underdog high school football team wins the big one with coaching tips from Scripture, and Fireproof (2008), in which a troubled fire chief rekindles his fractured marriage through faith. Together the three have grossed more than $55 million at the box office, and DVD sales have broken records at Christian bookstores. Plus, a book on marriage, spun from Fireproof, has been on The New York Times best-seller list for months.
Total costs for all three films? A mere $620,000, a figure well below what most big-time Hollywood producers spend on catering costs for just one movie, let alone three. That’s because most producers don’t have a 3,000-member congregation volunteering to work in front of or behind the camera. Sherwood members learned lighting, sound, makeup, costumes, sets on the job. They made up the cast. And the Kendrick brothers handled the writing, directing, producing, and editing. Alex even starred in the first two films.
While production values were admittedly rough in the first film, they grew solidly by the third without losing the homespun quality audiences seem to like. “People connect to these stories,” says Kris Fuhr, a marketing executive at Sony’s Provident Films, Fireproof’s distributor. “People look up on the screen and not only see themselves, they see their neighbors, friends, and coworkers.”
The films get high ratings on movie Websites. They have been credited with saving marriages, inspiring upset football victories, and reforming sleazy businessmen. They helped refine a grassroots marketing method for Christian films with hundreds of sneak previews at churches around the country—an effort that created a sense of “cause” around the film. And, happily for Sherwood, they have Hollywood clamoring for more. “I would love to have them deliver a picture or two every year,” says Meyer Gottlieb, president of Samuel Goldwyn Films. “That would be terrific.”
So, as the reporter from Hollywood asked, who are these guys—these Christian Coen brothers—and how did they do it? Their tale is one of perseverance, luck, an uncanny knack for storytelling, and faith. Mostly faith. “I think it’s because God helped us because we prayed,” says Alex. “We’re just hometown boys with a video camera. Logically it doesn’t make sense that the movies are working the way they are working.”
Their story opens in Smyrna, a suburb of Atlanta. In 1977, the Kendricks—Larry and Rhonwyn and their three sons, Shannon, 11, Alex, 8, and Stephen, 5—moved next to a family with children the same age and a father with a camcorder. The gang started filming skits, and commercials for made-up products—Stephen, for example, sweltering with rake and hoe in the hot sun to promote “Okra Cola.”
When video cameras became popular in the 1980s, the three Kendrick brothers advanced to secret agent movies that involved more kids from the neighborhood. They created numerous chase-’em-down-and-beat-’em-ups, plus an imaginative thriller called Mr. Tapeball, about an enormous ball of tape that takes over a church, devouring the ministers one by one. In lieu of book reports or science projects, they made movies and more movies.
But when it came to college, none of the boys chose film school. Shannon got an engineering degree from Georgia Tech and Alex and Stephen decided to join the ministry. They both went to Kennesaw State University, and they both landed jobs at the 5,000-member Roswell Street Baptist Church in Marietta. Alex worked with college students, Stephen oversaw the middle school kids. Both used filmmaking as a teaching tool.
Photos: Quantrell Colbert
Michael Catt, Alex Kendrick, and Jim McBride stand in front of the fire station where they filmed much of Fireproof.
In 1998, a friend from Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia, invited Alex to share his video skills at a Christian summer camp. Alex’s creative energy caught the attention of Sherwood’s senior pastor, Michael Catt, who was reshaping Sherwood using Rick Warren’s The Purpose Driven Church as a guide.
Pastor Catt wanted to find a balance of worship, discipleship, fellowship, ministry, and evangelism—and hoped one day he could take the gospel to the world.
During their first interview, Alex told Catt that his dream was to make full-length movies, to minister through film. From the dawn of time to today, Alex said, everybody liked hearing a good story. Nothing had changed except the avenue for telling them. Movies could be the ideal tool for Sherwood’s mission to reach the world.
Catt agreed, but for the moment he wanted Alex to run the church’s 24-hour cable TV station. That sounded impressive, but the “channel” was little more than a PowerPoint scroll of community announcements. Alex started producing inspirational programs as well as Christian versions of funniest home videos.
Then in 2002, a year after Stephen Kendrick joined his brother at Sherwood, Alex convinced Catt to make a movie. The audience would be the congregation, viewers of the TV station, and maybe people at a local theater. All he would need was a camera, some lenses, a new computer to edit on, and a few lights from Home Depot. He could pull it off, he said, for under $20,000.
Catt agreed, on two conditions. “First, you can take no money out of the church budget,” he told Alex. “So if this is of God, then you will have to pray the money in. Secondly, it cannot interfere with your ongoing job.”
Alex conceived a screenplay about a crooked used-car salesman who is having trouble in his business—and at home—because he is a cheat. His heart is not working properly; he’s like a car with no flywheel, the weighted disc that keeps engines running steady and even.
Catt loved the idea. But he allowed no soliciting for funds or announcements at services. The Kendricks could only post a notice in the prayer tower, a room where church members can visit to pray at any time. Amazingly, the $20,000 goal was soon reached, Alex got the green light and Flywheel started rolling.
Alex held no auditions. He simply invited church members with a taste for drama to help out. Shooting on Saturdays and lunch breaks, Alex cast himself in the lead role by default: He was the only person who could make himself available whenever the director wanted—because he was the director. The shooting schedule was haphazard. Alex would call around in the morning: “What are you doing from 11 to 1? Can we finish that scene we started three weeks ago? What were you wearing again?”
Once filming ended, Alex started stitching scenes together on his new computer. But he didn’t like what he saw. Stephen, who had been too busy to help much beyond offering plot ideas, saw that his brother was discouraged and stepped in. He quoted Psalm 127:1: “Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain.”
In other words, he told his brother, nothing can be successfully completed without the help of God. Pray and then finish the movie.
While Alex continued to edit, Stephen got a local theater to agree to give Flywheel a five-day run on one of its 16 screens, as “a good investment in the community.” The date was set for April 9, 2003. Stephen started putting up billboards announcing the movie all over town.
Then, with just three weeks to go, the storage disc, with 30 minutes of edited film, was knocked off a table and broken. They had no backup. At least 60 hours of work were lost. The brothers prayed, as did members of the congregation. Then Alex went back to editing, getting little sleep for the next 21 days.
He finished at 6:30 a.m., April 9. He burned a DVD and rushed it to the movie house, never watching it from beginning to end. At 1:00 p.m., cast and crew showed up for the first screening. As Alex prayed that the movie would make it to the end without messing up, he saw people all around him crying and laughing in all the right places. They rose and cheered at the end. Is this really working? he wondered.
It was. Flywheel ran for six weeks in Albany, outlasting 12 Hollywood feature films, and going neck and neck for the highest ticket sales with Jack Nicholson’s Anger Management, which was on three screens. Most encouraging were the phone calls and e-mails; a used-car salesman making a stand for what’s right, come what may, struck a chord. People admitted they had gone to the movie to see how embarrassing it would be but were transformed. Flywheel made them think, made them want to change their ways, made them want to start running their businesses honestly and get right with their families and with God.
But when the brothers tried to get wider distribution, they were told that Flywheel didn’t have a Hollywood “look.” Eventually they found a fan in David Nixon, who owned a studio in Orlando that made commercials for DisneyWorld. Nixon thought Flywheel’s production quality, lighting, and sound were all terrible, but the storytelling moved him. “Guys, I’m sitting here crying like a baby,” he told the Kendricks. “I want to help you make your next movie.”
Six months later, they sent him a script for a football film called Facing the Giants. He read it, Nixon recalls, jumping up and down, cheering, laughing, crying. Afterward he called Alex and Stephen, and offered to find them experts in photography, sound and lighting. Those experts would cost $80,000 to $100,000.
Sherwood’s earnings from Flywheel had gone into the church’s general fund, so the filmmakers were financially back to square one. But word got out and checks soon started to arrive, including an anonymous one for $20,000.
The idea for Facing the Giants was based on the story of a man in a wheelchair trying to figure out how to help his son kick an impossibly long field goal—a thinly veiled invocation of their father, Larry, who suffered from multiple sclerosis for more than 20 years. Even though he was disabled, he had managed to found a successful Christian school and, in the process, inspire his sons. Where Flywheel dealt with honesty, Giants would be about facing the twin fears of failure and disgrace.
Again, by default, Alex played the lead role, this time of a despondent, losing high school football coach who turns around a miserable season and wins the state championship against a big, bad juggernaut of a team with a take-no-prisoners coach (played by executive minister Jim McBride, a burly former Marine and pro wrestler).
David Nixon’s professionals came to Albany and slept on the floor at a small missionary house. On their first day they ran a boot camp, breaking volunteers into groups: If you want to learn lighting, go over there, for make-up, that room, for sound, back there.
These seasoned pros had never been on a movie set like this. Each day began with prayer. Church members brought picnic baskets of fried chicken and sweet tea. There were no prima donnas, no hissy fits, no storming off the set. Every obstacle was met with a pause and huddle for prayer, and more often than not, it seemed, a solution would appear. At the end of six weeks it was like the end of summer camp, everyone crying, no one wanting to say goodbye.
Alex Kendrick and Michael Catt took Facing the Giants to some distributors in Hollywood. Their best offer was a deal to go directly to DVD, with no theatrical run. They went home discouraged, feeling a door had been shut.
A few days later Stephen called Provident Music Group in Franklin, Tennessee, to get formal permission to use a popular Christian rock song that was in one of the scenes. The money Provident wanted—“tens of thousands,” Stephen said—took his breath away. “We’re a church,” he pleaded. “The movie’s a ministry! Can’t you give us a break?”
They would have to see the movie first. When the DVD arrived, Terry Hemmings, president and chief executive of Provident, said he would give it a few minutes while he ate lunch, but that he had a one o’clock meeting. After 15 minutes, he canceled his one o’clock and called his staff in to watch with him. After 30 minutes, he told his assistant to book him a flight to Albany. By the time the movie was over, he called Stephen Kendrick, who was fishing with his son.
“We’re in,” Hemmings said simply.
“In?” Stephen asked. “What does that mean?”
“Not only can you use our song but we will help you get distribution.” Could Stephen please send a DVD to Provident’s parent company, Sony? He didn’t mention the company is one of the largest moviemakers in the world.
The Kendricks were hoping to get the movie released in as many as 15 theaters around Atlanta; Sony executives thought 441 theaters nationwide was more like it. As for publicity, the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) handed them a miracle. It gave Facing the Giants a PG rating. Dumbfounded, Provident asked why. Too much proselytizing, they were told. Parents might get upset.
A firestorm erupted in the media, especially on talk shows like Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, and Michael Reagan. Were we now adding Jesus to profanity, violence, witchcraft, drug use, nudity? Was being Christian now the new sin? The Los Angeles Times asked: What does PG stand for? Pro-God? Too much God in a movie?
The MPAA tried to backpedal, claiming the PG rating was for the football violence and the adult theme of infertility (one of the coach’s fears is possible sterility). But that didn’t quell the protests. The controversy stirred up so much publicity that some accused the church of fomenting it. But Stephen Kendrick insists, “We never complained. We were just watching it happen. We weren’t manipulating, we were praying.” In fact, the whole congregation had been praying. One day Provident’s overwhelmed publicist was on the phone joking with Stephen, “Tell your church to stop praying!”
On September 29, 2006, Facing the Giants opened nationwide, and before its 17-week theatrical run ended, it was on 1,010 screens, earned $10 million in theaters, sold over 2 million DVDs, and became the No. 1-selling product in Christian bookstores. It touched the lives of three million people in 56 countries, in 13 languages. Coaches of Arkansas and Mississippi State credit it with inspiring their upset victories over Auburn and Alabama respectively in the 2008 college football season. And its most celebrated scene—“The Death Crawl”—is a hit on YouTube and has become a staple in motivational seminars across corporate America, including those of Wal-Mart, Mary Kay, and Beth Moore. The scene depicts Kendrick as the coach pursuading one of his more dispirited players to crawl the entire 100-yard length of the field with another player on his back—blindfolded. The boy perseveres, learning the spiritual lesson of endurance and trust.
One day before Giants was released, Alex got the idea for their next movie while jogging. He wanted a film that didn’t just make the audience feel good, but also had an impact on culture. It would be about divorce, a tool for marriages in distress. A man would try to win back his estranged wife’s love by following a 40-day program in a book called The Love Dare. The plan would take the couple small step by small step (spend the day saying nothing negative, today do one nice thing) to a mastery of unconditional love.
Stephen loved the idea. He had been ministering to people with troubled marriages for years. But, he said, this couldn’t be a “chick flick.” They needed to connect with men, as they had with the first two films. They would make the main character a man’s man—a fire chief. They went to the local firehouse and began learning about the lives of firefighters, who have one of the highest divorce rates in the country.
The brothers decided to call the movie Fireproof, and to link marriages to the buddy code in firefighting—never leave your partner behind, especially in a perilous situation.
No fund-raising this time. Provident Films fronted the movie $500,000. Production quality improved immensely. They were also able to add star power: Kirk Cameron, from ABC’s 1980s hit sitcom, Growing Pains. Cameron, who was now focusing his career on independent films with religious themes, took no salary. But the church agreed to make a sizable contribution to Camp Firefly, a camp for kids with terminal illnesses and their families that Cameron and his wife, Chelsea Noble, founded and have run for 20 years.
The film company still prayed on the set and still maintained the volunteer feel of a community project. But to market this movie, Michael Catt decided to host two screenings of Fireproof, each with a total of 4,000 pastors and their wives, at the annual Southern Baptist Convention in Indianapolis. “Those are 4,000 megaphones that go out and say, ‘I just saw this movie,’ ” he says. Provident’s PR machine then kicked in, and more than 250 similar screenings followed, with an average audience of 500. “It feels like there were a million people,” Catt says. And it paid off big-time.
From all over the country, requests for advance copies of the movie came cascading into the little church in Albany, Georgia. Everyone wanted to show the movie to their groups. Catt told them they had to wait until September.
And so it was that Fireproof came roaring into 839 theaters on September 26, 2008, ranking No. 4 in box-office sales nationwide, blowing past such multimillion-dollar releases as Miracle at St. Anna and Choke, holding on to earn $33 million at the box office, and finishing as the No. 1 indie feature of 2008.
Booksellers, meanwhile, started being flooded with requests for copies of The Love Dare, which was little more than a blank-paged prop in the movie. Demand was so strong that the Kendrick brothers had to sit down and write it in a hurry. Published by B&H Group of Nashville, the book came out October 12 and spent the next three months jumping back and forth between No. 1 and No. 2 on The New York Times best-seller paperback advice list.
Sherwood does not discuss its share of movie income. But executive pastor Jim McBride does point out that after theater owners, distributors, advertisers, promoters, and others take their cut, there is a lot less left for the church than one might expect. Even so, he says, there has been enough to help pay down debt for Sherwood’s Generations campaign, an outreach program aimed at youth. Included is a new $5 million sanctuary and a $4 million sports park open to the public. It features tennis courts, jogging trails, fishing ponds, horse stables, baseball diamonds, and a bright white 10-story-high cross.
The moviemaking ministers of Sherwood won’t say what their next film will be about or when it will come out. But they will continue creating films with volunteers—people of faith—and the Kendrick brothers are not giving up their day jobs at the church.
“Our goal is to touch people’s lives with a message of faith, hope, and love,” says Stephen Kendrick. “Christians are almost never portrayed accurately in movies. They are always these backwoods, narrow-minded, judgmental, hateful, weird people. And we’re thinking, Here we live with awesome, wonderful, loving, patriotic people.”
His movies say, “Here’s who we really are,” he says. “Here’s what we believe, here’s what happens in our lives. God works. He answers prayers.”
~Adapted from: http://www.purposedriven.com/article.html?c=132174&l=1~
By Christopher W. Davis 4/22/2009 11:57:37 AM
Not much happens in Albany, Georgia. Or so it seems. Yes, the town is the commercial center of southwestern Georgia, the birthplace of Ray Charles, the site of Martin Luther King Jr.’s 1961 “America’s shame” speech that led to his arrest, the pecan and quail-hunting capital of the world. But for the most part Albany has escaped the glare of national attention. So it was something of a surprise last fall when the associate pastor of one of the town’s 106 Baptist churches found himself on the phone with a newsman from The Hollywood Reporter.
The journalist was looking at the latest list of new movies, and here was this mini-budget, Christian film, Fireproof, coming out of nowhere—from the Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia, of all places—blowing everyone out of the water by opening at No. 4, beating out even Spike Lee’s hyper-hyped $45 million World War II epic, Miracle at St. Anna.
“Who in the world are you guys?” he asked, bewildered.
The associate pastor, Alex Kendrick, smiled. He loves it when the power of prayer stuns people.
In the past six years, Alex, 38, and his brother and fellow minister, Stephen, 35, have made three micro-budget movies that are redefining faith-based films—Flywheel (2003), a morality tale about a used-car salesman who saves his business by turning it over to God, Facing the Giants (2006), in which an underdog high school football team wins the big one with coaching tips from Scripture, and Fireproof (2008), in which a troubled fire chief rekindles his fractured marriage through faith. Together the three have grossed more than $55 million at the box office, and DVD sales have broken records at Christian bookstores. Plus, a book on marriage, spun from Fireproof, has been on The New York Times best-seller list for months.
Total costs for all three films? A mere $620,000, a figure well below what most big-time Hollywood producers spend on catering costs for just one movie, let alone three. That’s because most producers don’t have a 3,000-member congregation volunteering to work in front of or behind the camera. Sherwood members learned lighting, sound, makeup, costumes, sets on the job. They made up the cast. And the Kendrick brothers handled the writing, directing, producing, and editing. Alex even starred in the first two films.
While production values were admittedly rough in the first film, they grew solidly by the third without losing the homespun quality audiences seem to like. “People connect to these stories,” says Kris Fuhr, a marketing executive at Sony’s Provident Films, Fireproof’s distributor. “People look up on the screen and not only see themselves, they see their neighbors, friends, and coworkers.”
The films get high ratings on movie Websites. They have been credited with saving marriages, inspiring upset football victories, and reforming sleazy businessmen. They helped refine a grassroots marketing method for Christian films with hundreds of sneak previews at churches around the country—an effort that created a sense of “cause” around the film. And, happily for Sherwood, they have Hollywood clamoring for more. “I would love to have them deliver a picture or two every year,” says Meyer Gottlieb, president of Samuel Goldwyn Films. “That would be terrific.”
So, as the reporter from Hollywood asked, who are these guys—these Christian Coen brothers—and how did they do it? Their tale is one of perseverance, luck, an uncanny knack for storytelling, and faith. Mostly faith. “I think it’s because God helped us because we prayed,” says Alex. “We’re just hometown boys with a video camera. Logically it doesn’t make sense that the movies are working the way they are working.”
Their story opens in Smyrna, a suburb of Atlanta. In 1977, the Kendricks—Larry and Rhonwyn and their three sons, Shannon, 11, Alex, 8, and Stephen, 5—moved next to a family with children the same age and a father with a camcorder. The gang started filming skits, and commercials for made-up products—Stephen, for example, sweltering with rake and hoe in the hot sun to promote “Okra Cola.”
When video cameras became popular in the 1980s, the three Kendrick brothers advanced to secret agent movies that involved more kids from the neighborhood. They created numerous chase-’em-down-and-beat-’em-ups, plus an imaginative thriller called Mr. Tapeball, about an enormous ball of tape that takes over a church, devouring the ministers one by one. In lieu of book reports or science projects, they made movies and more movies.
But when it came to college, none of the boys chose film school. Shannon got an engineering degree from Georgia Tech and Alex and Stephen decided to join the ministry. They both went to Kennesaw State University, and they both landed jobs at the 5,000-member Roswell Street Baptist Church in Marietta. Alex worked with college students, Stephen oversaw the middle school kids. Both used filmmaking as a teaching tool.
Photos: Quantrell Colbert
Michael Catt, Alex Kendrick, and Jim McBride stand in front of the fire station where they filmed much of Fireproof.
In 1998, a friend from Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, Georgia, invited Alex to share his video skills at a Christian summer camp. Alex’s creative energy caught the attention of Sherwood’s senior pastor, Michael Catt, who was reshaping Sherwood using Rick Warren’s The Purpose Driven Church as a guide.
Pastor Catt wanted to find a balance of worship, discipleship, fellowship, ministry, and evangelism—and hoped one day he could take the gospel to the world.
During their first interview, Alex told Catt that his dream was to make full-length movies, to minister through film. From the dawn of time to today, Alex said, everybody liked hearing a good story. Nothing had changed except the avenue for telling them. Movies could be the ideal tool for Sherwood’s mission to reach the world.
Catt agreed, but for the moment he wanted Alex to run the church’s 24-hour cable TV station. That sounded impressive, but the “channel” was little more than a PowerPoint scroll of community announcements. Alex started producing inspirational programs as well as Christian versions of funniest home videos.
Then in 2002, a year after Stephen Kendrick joined his brother at Sherwood, Alex convinced Catt to make a movie. The audience would be the congregation, viewers of the TV station, and maybe people at a local theater. All he would need was a camera, some lenses, a new computer to edit on, and a few lights from Home Depot. He could pull it off, he said, for under $20,000.
Catt agreed, on two conditions. “First, you can take no money out of the church budget,” he told Alex. “So if this is of God, then you will have to pray the money in. Secondly, it cannot interfere with your ongoing job.”
Alex conceived a screenplay about a crooked used-car salesman who is having trouble in his business—and at home—because he is a cheat. His heart is not working properly; he’s like a car with no flywheel, the weighted disc that keeps engines running steady and even.
Catt loved the idea. But he allowed no soliciting for funds or announcements at services. The Kendricks could only post a notice in the prayer tower, a room where church members can visit to pray at any time. Amazingly, the $20,000 goal was soon reached, Alex got the green light and Flywheel started rolling.
Alex held no auditions. He simply invited church members with a taste for drama to help out. Shooting on Saturdays and lunch breaks, Alex cast himself in the lead role by default: He was the only person who could make himself available whenever the director wanted—because he was the director. The shooting schedule was haphazard. Alex would call around in the morning: “What are you doing from 11 to 1? Can we finish that scene we started three weeks ago? What were you wearing again?”
Once filming ended, Alex started stitching scenes together on his new computer. But he didn’t like what he saw. Stephen, who had been too busy to help much beyond offering plot ideas, saw that his brother was discouraged and stepped in. He quoted Psalm 127:1: “Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain.”
In other words, he told his brother, nothing can be successfully completed without the help of God. Pray and then finish the movie.
While Alex continued to edit, Stephen got a local theater to agree to give Flywheel a five-day run on one of its 16 screens, as “a good investment in the community.” The date was set for April 9, 2003. Stephen started putting up billboards announcing the movie all over town.
Then, with just three weeks to go, the storage disc, with 30 minutes of edited film, was knocked off a table and broken. They had no backup. At least 60 hours of work were lost. The brothers prayed, as did members of the congregation. Then Alex went back to editing, getting little sleep for the next 21 days.
He finished at 6:30 a.m., April 9. He burned a DVD and rushed it to the movie house, never watching it from beginning to end. At 1:00 p.m., cast and crew showed up for the first screening. As Alex prayed that the movie would make it to the end without messing up, he saw people all around him crying and laughing in all the right places. They rose and cheered at the end. Is this really working? he wondered.
It was. Flywheel ran for six weeks in Albany, outlasting 12 Hollywood feature films, and going neck and neck for the highest ticket sales with Jack Nicholson’s Anger Management, which was on three screens. Most encouraging were the phone calls and e-mails; a used-car salesman making a stand for what’s right, come what may, struck a chord. People admitted they had gone to the movie to see how embarrassing it would be but were transformed. Flywheel made them think, made them want to change their ways, made them want to start running their businesses honestly and get right with their families and with God.
But when the brothers tried to get wider distribution, they were told that Flywheel didn’t have a Hollywood “look.” Eventually they found a fan in David Nixon, who owned a studio in Orlando that made commercials for DisneyWorld. Nixon thought Flywheel’s production quality, lighting, and sound were all terrible, but the storytelling moved him. “Guys, I’m sitting here crying like a baby,” he told the Kendricks. “I want to help you make your next movie.”
Six months later, they sent him a script for a football film called Facing the Giants. He read it, Nixon recalls, jumping up and down, cheering, laughing, crying. Afterward he called Alex and Stephen, and offered to find them experts in photography, sound and lighting. Those experts would cost $80,000 to $100,000.
Sherwood’s earnings from Flywheel had gone into the church’s general fund, so the filmmakers were financially back to square one. But word got out and checks soon started to arrive, including an anonymous one for $20,000.
The idea for Facing the Giants was based on the story of a man in a wheelchair trying to figure out how to help his son kick an impossibly long field goal—a thinly veiled invocation of their father, Larry, who suffered from multiple sclerosis for more than 20 years. Even though he was disabled, he had managed to found a successful Christian school and, in the process, inspire his sons. Where Flywheel dealt with honesty, Giants would be about facing the twin fears of failure and disgrace.
Again, by default, Alex played the lead role, this time of a despondent, losing high school football coach who turns around a miserable season and wins the state championship against a big, bad juggernaut of a team with a take-no-prisoners coach (played by executive minister Jim McBride, a burly former Marine and pro wrestler).
David Nixon’s professionals came to Albany and slept on the floor at a small missionary house. On their first day they ran a boot camp, breaking volunteers into groups: If you want to learn lighting, go over there, for make-up, that room, for sound, back there.
These seasoned pros had never been on a movie set like this. Each day began with prayer. Church members brought picnic baskets of fried chicken and sweet tea. There were no prima donnas, no hissy fits, no storming off the set. Every obstacle was met with a pause and huddle for prayer, and more often than not, it seemed, a solution would appear. At the end of six weeks it was like the end of summer camp, everyone crying, no one wanting to say goodbye.
Alex Kendrick and Michael Catt took Facing the Giants to some distributors in Hollywood. Their best offer was a deal to go directly to DVD, with no theatrical run. They went home discouraged, feeling a door had been shut.
A few days later Stephen called Provident Music Group in Franklin, Tennessee, to get formal permission to use a popular Christian rock song that was in one of the scenes. The money Provident wanted—“tens of thousands,” Stephen said—took his breath away. “We’re a church,” he pleaded. “The movie’s a ministry! Can’t you give us a break?”
They would have to see the movie first. When the DVD arrived, Terry Hemmings, president and chief executive of Provident, said he would give it a few minutes while he ate lunch, but that he had a one o’clock meeting. After 15 minutes, he canceled his one o’clock and called his staff in to watch with him. After 30 minutes, he told his assistant to book him a flight to Albany. By the time the movie was over, he called Stephen Kendrick, who was fishing with his son.
“We’re in,” Hemmings said simply.
“In?” Stephen asked. “What does that mean?”
“Not only can you use our song but we will help you get distribution.” Could Stephen please send a DVD to Provident’s parent company, Sony? He didn’t mention the company is one of the largest moviemakers in the world.
The Kendricks were hoping to get the movie released in as many as 15 theaters around Atlanta; Sony executives thought 441 theaters nationwide was more like it. As for publicity, the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) handed them a miracle. It gave Facing the Giants a PG rating. Dumbfounded, Provident asked why. Too much proselytizing, they were told. Parents might get upset.
A firestorm erupted in the media, especially on talk shows like Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, and Michael Reagan. Were we now adding Jesus to profanity, violence, witchcraft, drug use, nudity? Was being Christian now the new sin? The Los Angeles Times asked: What does PG stand for? Pro-God? Too much God in a movie?
The MPAA tried to backpedal, claiming the PG rating was for the football violence and the adult theme of infertility (one of the coach’s fears is possible sterility). But that didn’t quell the protests. The controversy stirred up so much publicity that some accused the church of fomenting it. But Stephen Kendrick insists, “We never complained. We were just watching it happen. We weren’t manipulating, we were praying.” In fact, the whole congregation had been praying. One day Provident’s overwhelmed publicist was on the phone joking with Stephen, “Tell your church to stop praying!”
On September 29, 2006, Facing the Giants opened nationwide, and before its 17-week theatrical run ended, it was on 1,010 screens, earned $10 million in theaters, sold over 2 million DVDs, and became the No. 1-selling product in Christian bookstores. It touched the lives of three million people in 56 countries, in 13 languages. Coaches of Arkansas and Mississippi State credit it with inspiring their upset victories over Auburn and Alabama respectively in the 2008 college football season. And its most celebrated scene—“The Death Crawl”—is a hit on YouTube and has become a staple in motivational seminars across corporate America, including those of Wal-Mart, Mary Kay, and Beth Moore. The scene depicts Kendrick as the coach pursuading one of his more dispirited players to crawl the entire 100-yard length of the field with another player on his back—blindfolded. The boy perseveres, learning the spiritual lesson of endurance and trust.
One day before Giants was released, Alex got the idea for their next movie while jogging. He wanted a film that didn’t just make the audience feel good, but also had an impact on culture. It would be about divorce, a tool for marriages in distress. A man would try to win back his estranged wife’s love by following a 40-day program in a book called The Love Dare. The plan would take the couple small step by small step (spend the day saying nothing negative, today do one nice thing) to a mastery of unconditional love.
Stephen loved the idea. He had been ministering to people with troubled marriages for years. But, he said, this couldn’t be a “chick flick.” They needed to connect with men, as they had with the first two films. They would make the main character a man’s man—a fire chief. They went to the local firehouse and began learning about the lives of firefighters, who have one of the highest divorce rates in the country.
The brothers decided to call the movie Fireproof, and to link marriages to the buddy code in firefighting—never leave your partner behind, especially in a perilous situation.
No fund-raising this time. Provident Films fronted the movie $500,000. Production quality improved immensely. They were also able to add star power: Kirk Cameron, from ABC’s 1980s hit sitcom, Growing Pains. Cameron, who was now focusing his career on independent films with religious themes, took no salary. But the church agreed to make a sizable contribution to Camp Firefly, a camp for kids with terminal illnesses and their families that Cameron and his wife, Chelsea Noble, founded and have run for 20 years.
The film company still prayed on the set and still maintained the volunteer feel of a community project. But to market this movie, Michael Catt decided to host two screenings of Fireproof, each with a total of 4,000 pastors and their wives, at the annual Southern Baptist Convention in Indianapolis. “Those are 4,000 megaphones that go out and say, ‘I just saw this movie,’ ” he says. Provident’s PR machine then kicked in, and more than 250 similar screenings followed, with an average audience of 500. “It feels like there were a million people,” Catt says. And it paid off big-time.
From all over the country, requests for advance copies of the movie came cascading into the little church in Albany, Georgia. Everyone wanted to show the movie to their groups. Catt told them they had to wait until September.
And so it was that Fireproof came roaring into 839 theaters on September 26, 2008, ranking No. 4 in box-office sales nationwide, blowing past such multimillion-dollar releases as Miracle at St. Anna and Choke, holding on to earn $33 million at the box office, and finishing as the No. 1 indie feature of 2008.
Booksellers, meanwhile, started being flooded with requests for copies of The Love Dare, which was little more than a blank-paged prop in the movie. Demand was so strong that the Kendrick brothers had to sit down and write it in a hurry. Published by B&H Group of Nashville, the book came out October 12 and spent the next three months jumping back and forth between No. 1 and No. 2 on The New York Times best-seller paperback advice list.
Sherwood does not discuss its share of movie income. But executive pastor Jim McBride does point out that after theater owners, distributors, advertisers, promoters, and others take their cut, there is a lot less left for the church than one might expect. Even so, he says, there has been enough to help pay down debt for Sherwood’s Generations campaign, an outreach program aimed at youth. Included is a new $5 million sanctuary and a $4 million sports park open to the public. It features tennis courts, jogging trails, fishing ponds, horse stables, baseball diamonds, and a bright white 10-story-high cross.
The moviemaking ministers of Sherwood won’t say what their next film will be about or when it will come out. But they will continue creating films with volunteers—people of faith—and the Kendrick brothers are not giving up their day jobs at the church.
“Our goal is to touch people’s lives with a message of faith, hope, and love,” says Stephen Kendrick. “Christians are almost never portrayed accurately in movies. They are always these backwoods, narrow-minded, judgmental, hateful, weird people. And we’re thinking, Here we live with awesome, wonderful, loving, patriotic people.”
His movies say, “Here’s who we really are,” he says. “Here’s what we believe, here’s what happens in our lives. God works. He answers prayers.”
~Adapted from: http://www.purposedriven.com/article.html?c=132174&l=1~
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